Another Personal Update...

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Hey there beautiful souls!! First, I am so sorry for the lack of communication, these last several weeks have been chaos on steroids in my world. I cannot remember the last thing I wrote about so forgive me if I am repeating myself.

As anyone who was on my schedule the week prior to leaving Texas knows, I was sick as a dog (where does that expression come from?) I threw everything I knew and had on hand at my lungs, my inhalers, breathing treatments and prednizone and still not the first sign of easy breathing. I had no choice but to take my butt to the ER (with a lot of instance from my kids.) I suppose its a good thing, and not really at the same time. The first ER doc (I was there just as the shifts were changing) ordered a series of blood tests to include to see if I had any clots in my lungs. That test came back off the charts, and the second doc ordered a CT scan with contrast.

Thankfully, no clots in the lungs, which I already felt was the case. However, there was a nodule on my lung my oncologist had been monitoring every year, that my new lung doc insisted was not present. I told my lung doc I needed a CT with contrast instead of the one he ordered, which was without contrast. He insisted I was wrong and he was correct. I will never understand doctors and their need to be right.

My CT scan at the hospital showed that that nodule had changed and got bigger.

There is no time for that stuff. I pushed myself to get my house packed in time for teh movers to load my life up and put it in storage until I found my new home in Virginia.

My pregnant daughter sent her husband to Texas to drive me to Virginia, something I will eternally be grateful for. Along with Linda from the Nation coming up on the last day to help me clean the house on my last day there, I would have never been ready without these two precious souls help!!

My landlord so graciously cut me a check for the refund of my deposit before I left, which gave me my move in money for my next new adventure.

I am so beyond blessed by the people who are in my life. The donations that came in has helped more than I can ever say. I would have been zeroed financially a lot sooner than I am now. Thank you for loving me that much!!!

With Alex driving the whole way, it made it much easier on me. We stopped in the French Quarter of New Orleans because we could. That was awesome. Some seriously weird food is served there lol.

The first thing I tried to do when I got to my daughters house was find a new oncologist. No money and no insurance has made that an impossibility at the moment. I cannot even get call backs to talk about options. So I shelved that concern and took to house hunting.

I do not remember the last time I was so consistently stressed out to the point of cranky irritability almost all day long. Valorie and Alex have bent over backwards to take care of me, making sure my needs are met. I felt so bad displacing Alex to the couch, 6’5” Alex!! He refused to let me sleep there. I tried to do my readings from their house, I never realized how noisy it is. They have a two main roads running at the side and back of their house and all I could hear was traffic (I am so easily distracted.) Not to mention it rained every day since I arrived in Virginia. I tried reading in my car… nope. So more reschedules.

I found the house I wanted instantly, but man we are living in a world of online do everything without a human. The only time I got to see and speak to the realtor was when I gave them the security deposit. Even just looking at the house came with a code for 99 cents. Then an admin fee of $250 (wth is that all about?) but…. I was approved instantly, once I figured out how to get everything uploaded to them.

My furniture is still in Texas and I am hoping will be here sometime this week. It gets loaded on the truck Monday and they will give me an arrival date then.

I did get real internet hooked up yesterday. I now have full comfortable access to my computer (I put the computer table in my car not on the truck and bought a folding chair from walmart. I kinda wish I got one with a cushion lol, but its only a few more days before my stuff gets here and my ass is provided for!! lol

Valorie and Alex had their baby on November 15th, the very same day, 5 years prior, my father found his way Home. Life and death…

The baby, Zachariah Fenix is perfect. I was allowed the privilege of watching the birth and he came out eyes open and did all he could do keep them open and explore his new world. It was so humbling!! He weighed 8 pounds, 2 ounces and a whopping 21.5 inches long, with really big feet!! Daddy’s boy lol.

Zach came home yesterday and I slept at my new place for the first time last night (Alex lent me a blow up mattress.)

Trying to find my center and my way out of the chaos has been much more challenging than I anticipated. I am hoping sleeping here will allow me to bond with my new space and find my new field of connection, which just has not happened yet. But I am more centered today than I have been in weeks. So today and the next few days I will be playing catch up. I have over 500 emails in my inbox (me and my laptop have been estranged until today lol) so please forgive me for the delay in getting everything reorganized and set up to functional again.

I love and miss you all so much. Thank you for bobbing and weaving with me and holding my heart thru all this change. I cannot tell you how much I appreciate each and every one of you.

Big big big (((((HUGZ)))))) filled with gratitude and love!!

Lisa Gawlas

Lisa Gawlas1 Comment